also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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