I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
i believe in u and ur pee
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
