Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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