she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize