R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
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