He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
