My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize