went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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