would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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