tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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