I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
