I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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