I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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