Me. At least after what I've been through.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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