Non-Jews are for practice
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
ugly people sure do ruin things
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize