Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(916): View more from California

I'm really into asian looking animals

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(818): View more from California

Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear

(952): View more from Minnesota

gross she's a slut

(612): View more from Minnesota

yea she doesn't shave either

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(317): View more from Indiana

we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(336): View more from North Carolina

just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...

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(419): View more from Ohio

She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...

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(706): View more from Georgia

It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa

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(817): View more from Texas

So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?

(806): View more from Texas

Yes.

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(360): View more from Washington

I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.

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