I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
