hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
