Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
If I die, sorry about rent.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
