I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
