i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
not ubering you a puppy
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
