just tell him i said nine months
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
