Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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