If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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