in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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