she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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