i was rollin on her like bob the builder
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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