It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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