Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Randomize
