i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
