best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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