I think I died a long time ago.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There's always time for handjobs
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
