I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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