Please, let me fuck your mom
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
