if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
