i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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