So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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