in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
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it was like having sex with a tree stump
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
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Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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