This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
