that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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