Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
