capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
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