Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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