He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize