One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
