The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
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