the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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