now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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