we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
