I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
